


If I Could I Would (But I Don’t Know How)

by Raisintorte



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-31
Updated: 2011-01-31
Packaged: 2017-10-17 12:36:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/176915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raisintorte/pseuds/Raisintorte
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Reid likes Prentiss and Prentiss likes Reid.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If I Could I Would (But I Don’t Know How)

**Author's Note:**

> Major, major thanks to smittywing and wojelah for cheerleading and handholding and betaing. They are the bestest betas (and BFFs) a girl could ask for.
> 
> Blink and you miss it spoiler for The Eyes Have It (5x06)

Reid stared at the bottle of scotch in front of him, thinking he was going need more than the two fingers he had poured to get up the courage to approach Emily about possibly having sex with him.

It wasn’t like he was nervous (he was) or thought she would say no (she probably would) but she was _Emily Prentiss_ and he was Spencer Reid and even though he was sure she had been dropping hints (pretty sure) actually approaching her was not something that was coming easy to him (nothing with women ever did.)

And that’s how he found himself in his apartment on a Friday night, staring at a bottle of scotch and calculating how much of it he would have to drink to call Emily and see if she wanted to go out on a date (or have sex, but he would start with a date first - even though he sucked at dating he thought it would be nice to date Emily). Given the alcohol content of bottle, his height and weight, his tolerance for alcohol, and his current empty stomach, it would probably take 1..5 highball glasses before he was inebriated enough to call her (or so he thought, he didn’t actually have any scientific data on the level of inebriation one colleague had achieve to call another colleague with whom he previously had had nothing more than a working relationship and ask her on a date).

However, the problem with drinking that amount was if she said yes, and yes involved going out _tonight_ he would be too drunk to drive and he was pretty sure that would not be a good way to start things off and thereby lowering the likelihood of seeing her naked. He could picture the conversation now: “Oh you want to go out tonight? Uh, well, can you come get me, because I had to get drunk to make this call, so you’re going to have to be the one to drive.” And he could just see Prentiss reacting well to that (she would probably laugh at him and hang up.) Which brought him back to the two fingers of scotch in his glass.

He could call Garcia, and she would totally help him out, but then she would call Emily and JJ and tell them all about it because he was pretty sure those three shared _everything_ (except for JJ when she first started dating Will, but everyone figured that out pretty quickly). And that probably wouldn’t change anything (or it totally would) - if Emily was going to say no she would still say no or just not pick up the phone when he called and if she was going to say yes, she would hopefully still say yes (though having Garcia and JJ involved might scare her off, but he didn’t really think that would happen.) If she wanted this, she would do it (and hopefully him, but right now that was only in his dreams.)

He was pretty sure everyone in the BAU suspected (or totally knew) that he was attracted to Emily and he was pretty sure (or not sure at all) that she was attracted to him. Given the amount of time they all spent together and the nature of their job, it was hard to just shut it off and not notice things.

It was just the little things - the looks she gave him when she thought he wasn’t looking, the random cups of _good_ coffee with the sugar just the way he liked it from the place near her apartment appearing magically on his desk, the ticket to see George Takei and Avery Brooks talk at the Franklin Institute in Philadelphia that he was pretty sure was meant to be a date, but then they ended up in Spokane, Washington chasing an enucleator (although at least this one didn’t put the eyes in dead animals) and they missed the talk so he never got a chance to find out, it was enough that he didn’t think he reading too much into nothing. But he really did suck at dating, but he didn’t want to suck at dating Prentiss.

Emily was just amazing to him. She was a gorgeous nerd (self-professed!) who joked and laughed with him, and not at him (which, given his life experience was a rare thing). She was funny and interesting and no matter how hard the task or how tough the situation, she handled it well. She didn’t treat him like he was a human computer (aside from the occasional joke) but her actions always showed she thought of him as an equal and a person.

Reid scrubbed his hands against his eyes trying to get out of his own head. He stared at the glass on the table and debated just downing the whole thing, but that would just probably start him coughing when the liquid burned its way down his throat (when people said that scotch went down smooth he was pretty sure they were lying, because even Rossi’s good stuff made his throat ache) and then he would sound hoarse if he actually called Emily.

The phone’s buzzing startled him out of his thoughts and he looked at the caller id - Penelope Garcia.

“Hello my boy wonder, it is I, your social butterfly and goddess of all things.” Penelope said, her voice ringing clearly though the phone.

“Hey Garcia.” Even though he had thought about calling her, now that he was actually talking to her, he as pretty sure it would be a horrible idea to ask her about Emily.

“What, no kind words for the savior of your Friday night? Drinks! and Dinner! and Dancing! Join us and enjoy a magical evening with yours truly and her man.”

Reid stared at his scotch glass and considered the offer, but he decided he was going to have to decline. He just wasn’t in the mood to go out. “Uh, thanks for asking Penelope, but I think I’m going to pass.”

“Your loss! Kevin and I will have all of the drinks and dancing! You and Emily! You would think after this crazy week you would both be dying to get out, but you both turned me down!. . . . ” Garcia continued talking but Reid zoned out to think about Emily and just made noises where he thought was appropriate, “ . . . All right, my sexy little smarty pants, I’ll see you on Monday! Bye.”

“Bye, Garcia.” Reid hung up the phone and went back to contemplating his drink.

* * *

Emily sat on her couch, not sure why she had turned down Garcia, but she hadn’t really felt like a crazy night out (and nights with Garcia and Kevin were always crazy). A quiet night in was exactly what she needed after the past week: three days with little sleep, one seriously messed-up unsub (weren’t they all?) and a long plane ride home.

After they had gotten back to the BAU she had thought about seeing if Reid wanted to grab a bite but he had just packed up his bag and headed out, looking lost in his thoughts, so she hadn’t asked. He was so hard to read. She had though he was attracted to her (and so did Garcia and JJ - even Morgan had commented on it), however, aside from a few glances, the mystery chocolates that showed up on her desk every few weeks (which had to be him because she didn’t think anyone else had been around when she expressed her undying love for sea salt and dark chocolate truffles) she didn’t really have any concrete evidence (and she was a girl who liked evidence). She had tried to ask him on a date awhile back (though she hadn’t really expressly asked him on a date so much as she had handed him a ticket and kept one for herself, which wasn’t exactly the clearest way to ask someone out, but he _had_ taken the ticket) but then a case had come came up and they had missed the lecture and she hadn’t tried again.

Two days ago she had gone undercover as a hooker to bait an unsub who was targeting the bottom-tier whores in a really bad part of Nashville. While they had prepped for the operation, JJ had run out to some local store recommend by the ladies in vice to pick something up for her that screamed “cheap hooker.” JJ had come back with what could at best be described as a scrap of fabric as a skirt with a cheap flannel shirt for her top. Emily tied the bottom off, baring her midriff and unbuttoned, baring her not-insignificant chest (covered only by a cheap magenta lace bra.) She was sure the skirt was actually some sort of headband but JJ had assured her it was actually a skirt (except she was pretty sure JJ was trying to get revenge for the last time she had to pick out JJ’s undercover outfit, which ended up being a French maid costume.)

When she had walked into the staging area, Morgan had done his usual catcalling, Hotch’s expression hadn’t changed, and Rossi had made some sort of comment that clearly qualified as sexual harassment (which was classic Rossi and she wouldn’t have it any other way). She had been watching Reid closely to see his reaction so she’d noticed his eyes widen ever so slightly but if he had any other reaction he suppressed it. He’d just gone about finishing his prep work and gotten into place for the operation. Not that she could count “not ogling her when she was about to put herself directly in the path of an unsub” as evidence that he wasn’t attracted to her, but part of her had hoped for something more from him.

Reid was cute and funny and just something about him made her want to pull him close and keep him there (and then screw his brains out, because he really was quite fuckable). There were definitely times when they were in briefings that she just wanted to kiss him to shut him up (really, she just wanted to kiss him).

The undercover operation had been a success and they had caught the guy before he’d tortured and murdered anyone else. When they had been packing up to head back to the plane, Reid and Morgan had been talking about picking up ladies (well, Morgan was talking and Reid was just chiming in occasionally) and Reid had said that he usually liked to go to dinner first. Morgan had finished packing up his stuff and had left Reid alone with her and it seemed as if he wanted to ask her something and she’d thought (or, well hoped) that it would be an invitation dinner, but then he’d just asked if she needed any help packing up and they had finished and headed to the jet in silence.

She had probably read too much into nothing which is how she ended up sitting on her couch on a Friday wondering why she’d turned down dinner and dancing (even though she hadn’t really wanted to go). She wasn’t really the sit-at-home-and-stew kind of woman. She was a lady of action and if she wanted Reid, she should just go and get him.

And that was what she decided to do. She sucked at dating, so she might as well just jump straight to the showing up at his apartment and screwing his brains out part of the evening.

* * *

Reid saw headlights cross his window as a car turned into the lot in front of his condo. The cars were never for him (except the one time Morgan had to come get him when his phone died and they were called in on a weekend) so he didn’t think anything of it until he heard the knock on his door. He figured it must be Garcia and Kevin, there to drag him out for a night of drinking and dancing.

As he was crossing his living room to check the peephole he looked at the indent in his couch, the two fingers of scotch still sitting in his glass, and decided if it was Garcia and Kevin giving him a second chance at a Friday evening, he was in.

Except when he got to the peephole and looked through it wasn’t Garcia - it was Emily. Who was looking vaguely annoyed. He stood at the door, staring through the peephole.

“Reid. Stop staring at me thought the peep hole and let me in. I can hear you breathing.” Emily’s voice shook Reid out of his stare and he undid his security chain and opened the door.

“Uh, sorry, come in,” Reid said as he stepped aside so Emily could walk through the door. She looked around his apartment and headed to the couch without saying a word.

“Drinking alone?” she said as she looked at the bottle and picked up the glass. “Well, you certainly haven’t made it far, because it looks like everything you have poured out of this bottle is in this glass. Here, let me help.” Emily downed the two fingers of scotch, unscrewed the cap, and poured two more fingers and held the glass out toward Reid. “Have a drink with me?”

“No thanks.” Reid shook his head and sat down on the couch next to Emily. “So, what, ah, brings you here tonight?”

“Seriously, Reid? You know why I’m here. Same reason you have been staring at that bottle of scotch since you got home from work.”

“You. Sex, well ah dating, maybe” Reid tried to cover for saying sex and looked at Emily. She just looked amused and maybe a little hopoeful, too. He had meant to say dating, but he had been thinking about naked Emily Prentiss, so sex was the first thing on his mind. “Statistically, when two co-workers enter into a relationship of any sort there is a very good chance that there will be some form of work place drama, and given our group, job, lives, added drama is the last thing that either of us need.” Reid stopped talking before he put his foot further in his mouth.

“That’s your problem though. You think too much.” Emily smiled and leaned over on the couch and pulled him close to her. “I mean, thinking is a good thing.” She started running her fingers up and down his arm causing making his whole body tingle. “If you are thinking about the right things.” She was practically whispering at this point her mouth so close to his ear he could feel her breath on his cheek.

“Emily Prentiss, are you trying to seduce me?” Reid smiled and leaned back on the couch, pulling away from her.

Emily laughed and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him back toward her. “No. I’m trying to get you to have sex with me.” She said, her lips just inches from his, practically begging him to kiss her. He leaned forward ever so slightly and brushed his lips against hers. That was all the encouragement Emily needed - she wrapped her arms around him and deepened the kiss.

The kiss went on for a while before Reid pulled back and untangled himself from Emily. She let out a small whimper as he pulled away.

“So, would you like to go grab dinner?” Reid felt a little silly asking when they were clearly heading toward something they both wanted, but food was always a good starting point and given he sucked at dating other people and she had previously said she sucked at dating, they might not suck dating each other.

Emily laughed and maneuvered herself on the couch until she was straddling him completely. “Reid, I came over to your house, I kissed you, and now I’m sitting on your lap. Are you really suggesting we go out to _dinner_? Do I need to get naked in your living room before you realize that I’m here because I want you?” She dipped her head down and gave him a quick hard kiss.

“Well, I can’t say I would be opposed to living room stripping, however, statistically speak -” Reid was cut off by Emily leaning down to kiss him again.

Emily paused kissing him and said, “No statistics. Not tonight.”

“Okay. No statistics. Got it. Anyway, I was just thinking that dinner would be nice.” Reid hoped he didn’t sound like a total idiot as he was speaking. This wasn’t just some girl, this was _Emily_.

“Reid, we don’t know what this is, but I’m here and you’re here, and I want you and - ” Emily wiggled her hips a little, causing Reid to become even harder than he already was (if that was possible) - “unless you’re packing, I’m pretty damn sure you want me too. I know most of your secrets and you know mine, so I don’t think we need to have dinner to break the ice.” Emily rolled her legs off of him and stood up. Reid snagged her arm and and maneuvered her back down next to him on the couch.

“No, we don’t _need_ dinner. And it’s not that I don’t want to have sex with you because clearly I _really_ do, but even though we know each others’ secrets sometimes dinner is just nice.” Reid put his arm around Emily and tugged her in close. He couldn’t believe he was turning down sex with Prentiss, but he suddenly wanted more than just a quick tumble in his living room.

“Okay.” Emily said as she sat up and smoothed down her clothing and her hair.

“Okay?” That was not exactly the response Reid was expected from Emily (he had been expecting it to be a no, and he didn’t realize just how much he wanted her to say yes until she actually said it.)

“Yup. Okay. Dinner it is. You’re right. Sometimes dinner is just nice.” Emily stood up and walked toward the door. “But you should know, if I buy, I expect you to put out.”

“I think I’m good with that.” Reid smiled and grabbed his car keys and shut off the lights. He opened the door and followed Emily out, putting his arm around her as they walked down the hall. This evening was definitely going better places then it had been and that was nothing but a good thing.


End file.
